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Saturday, October 3, 2009

Welcome to Mommyhood! There is no turning back

Do you remember the day you found out the you were pregnant? You probably were swarmed with emotions of happiness, fear, anxiety, and amazement. It is a precious moment because it is the moment that changes your life forever. After your thoughts stop racing and the adrenaline rush calms, you begin to feel the onset of being pregnant. I mean the sickness, the fatigue, exhaustion and lovely hormones. Many women are blessed with the lack of morning sickness and pregnancy complications, but still many women are given all the symptoms. Nine full months of on and off sickness, fatigue, hormones and constant excitement. As the D-Day nears, you experience the anxiety of childbirth (especially if it is your first). It comes down to sleepless night due to discomfort and the constant urge to pee. Your feet are swollen, you back hurts, and right when you feel you are loosing your sanity, it's time to have a baby.

Everyone has different experiences, but overall they all compare in one way or another. After all the unnerving pain and loss of modesty (which you may have felt from all your OBGYN visits), you are now a new mother. Congratulations! You have a little one which has caused you to feel absolutely untouchable love. Your life is now complete and your life has now completely changed for the rest of your life. What could be better than being a mother at this time? Well your right its amazing, but as everyone else you probably got home and said, "Oh, how do I do this?!"

Regardless of the books you have read, the advice your friends and mother's have given you, you are forced to find your own way as the mother of your child. You are immediately put into a dilemma of being stuck in limbo between your own instincts, advice from others and advice from your pediatrician. One piece of advice that my mother told me that I think says it all is, "Trust your instincts when it comes to your baby". That statement could not be more true. Is this screaming normal? I think my baby is in pain? Is my baby gaining enough weight or sleeping long enough? Every new mom is completely overwhelmed with more stress and anxiety which is unavoidable, and unexplainable to those who have never experienced it. Your entire world changes and it can be so stressful you feel like each day is climbing a mountain in which you cannot see the top. Don't misunderstand that it is very enjoyable to watch your baby grow and thrive in the world, but you almost need to buy bottles of wine and gallons of bubble bath just to keep sane. Everyone always says, it will get better, and it will get easier, and you almost look at them as if they were insane and have no clue. The reality is, that it does get better. Your learn to trust your instincts, learn your baby and what he or she likes and dislikes. You learn how not to cringe when your baby screams, or cry with your baby as they go through hours of crying. It's amazing but you adjust and you relearn yourself in the process.

New mom's are not alone, and you will survive believe it or not! You may need a glass of wine each night, and a good friend that will listen to you go on and on about your baby and frustrations. I am slowly learning that each day is a new day, and brings new obstacles and new memories. My friend asked me the other night, " Is she your greatest accomplishment?" and without even thinking I could honestly say yes.

This post was contributed by Molly Bortree

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