It seems so simple. Wake up to the sound of your favorite radio station, sometimes even a song you enjoy! Get out of bed, go to the bathroom, wash your face, brush your teeth. We start teaching it to our children very early on, we learned it so long ago ourselves. Once we stopped taking baths before bed we added the early morning shower to our routine. Actually used a hair-dryer to take the chill off. Used the essential toiletries. Picked out something to wear. Maybe changed our clothes several times. And then went about our day.
Switch to Motherhood.
Wake up because your child screams "Mama!'' and it pierces through your dreams. Rush to the bathroom while said child continues screaming. Barely wash your hands as you leave the bathroom and make your way to your baby's room. (If at all possible throw in a load of laundry while telling your child you'll be 'just a minute!')
Once you have your child with you the battle begins. Depending on the child's age, you may: a) immediately change baby's diaper, b) battle with your toddler to ALLOW you to change her diaper!?! or c) say forget about it and let her walk around with a puffy overnight diaper until she poops.
If you're lucky you'll change out of your PJs into a fresh pair of sweats for the day. Pull your hair back into the standard ponytail and wipe the crud out of your eyes. Once downstairs you start the coffee, or pour yourself a chai tea (like me) and try to figure out how you're going to get her to eat breakfast.
A few hours into the morning and you'll realize that you haven't brushed your teeth yet and that the weird smell is coming from YOU. If you were lucky enough to shower you've perfected the 2 minutes or less cleaning experience and conditioner is a thing of the past. Remember all of those personal products you used to buy? Well, they're growing old in your locked cabinets under your sink. You haven't met a razor in months, forget what it's like to run a comb through your hair and don't even get me started on your undergarments.
I wish I could tell all the brand new mommies or the mommies-to-be that it gets better, but considering my 2 minute shower this morning consisted of locking my 2-year-old into the bathroom with me while she played with her flashlight (shining it in on me like an inquisition!) I can't promise you much.
But hang in there. They have to grow up and give you some privacy eventually. Right? I mean, they HAVE to. Otherwise I'll resort to hopping in the bathtub with her (don't judge, you know you've considered it!) and using pre-soaped baby washcloths for myself. Hey, don't knock it til you've tried it, the things work in a pinch!
This post was written by Andrea Bates, username ACE1028 on TriangleMommies.